Friday, May 10, 2013

Prelude to: Navigating Jackd - a more proactive approach

WAZZZ COOKIN' broseidons of the sea???

SO. Life has been really strange now that I'm a lot more sober. HAH, sounding straight up like an alcoholic right there! A few things before I talk about Jackd.

No one is in the office today. Both my boss and my buddy took the day off, shwwinggg!!! I took a two-hour lunch just now with Dutchie and a few other exchange kids at their college canteen. Nothing too eventful, just squeezed his butt a couple times cheekily and he hit me really hard.

I finally bought protein powder! 10 lbs of chocolate-flavored whey. BOOYAH, gon get shredded brah!!! I didn't get a shaker bottle, so I'm just using a regular aluminum bottle instead, hopefully that does the trick. Now I'm really gonna set my mind and body into getting into (better) shape. I shall aim to put on 4-5 kg more, while reducing my body fat % from 18 to 14. Shall set myself a time horizon of four months too. Think my goals are pretty realistic. However, I'm taking a month off to travel, so I'm not sure how this is gonna work out lolol...probably will just do some pushups here and there at night?? I'm really vain, I probably will do pushups before heading out at night because I wanna look bigger. My main aims are to increase my chest width, and well, biceps really. Vanity muscles ftw. Calves? Screw that. Besides I'm not gonna be some kind of hulk, so I don't need to train my legs that much lest I end up looking like a "uterus" (seriously, that was what my Hong Kong friend once told me).

Sidetrack. Ooh I love it that this is my personal blogosphere and I can talk about any shit that I want bitch! About said Hong Kong friend above. We were both interns at the same investment bank last year in Hong Kong. He's slightly shorter than me, had a pretty grumpy "default" face, but was very muscular. Oh, and he's Asian btw, I do like Asian guys too lol, I'm not exactly a "potato queen" as what some of my mofo gay "friends" here call me. I was very attracted to him. He definitely fell into the dubious category, where he could be gay, but it wasn't obvious at all, like, AT ALL.

These are the guys that draw me in the most, probably because I like playing detective, but definitely more because I might actually stand a chance at hooking up with them. Why I felt he was suspect was because he was a good-looking dude (good-looking in a very Chinese way) who didn't have a girlfriend, plus he was visibly very awkard when talking about his previous relationship (he revealed absolutely nothing). And also, he did not talk about girls at all. Like most straight dudes talk about girls at least once every two-three days, or like a "yo check that girl out" kind of thing, but he never once did, even when I would some times be like "yo check that chica out" he wasn't that interested. However, I've realized that this theory is way flawed, because my metro rugby friend who has never had a girlfriend in his 24 years of existence really is just a metro rugby straight guy who isn't into dudes. But then again, whatever, in my books, these guys are suspect until proven straight, and so I get to be a lil cheeky with them.

HK dude and I quickly became pretty good bros, grabbing lunch together, visiting each other on our separate office floors, chatting online, etc. There was once when I saw that he was headed for the bathroom with a bright neon orange dri-fit sleeveless top in his hand (shit. I realized I remember it so well because I thought he looked so good in it), and I casually followed him and chatted with him. Turns out he was going for hockey training, and he was getting changed to head over after work. I lingered in the bathroom asking him really dumb questions, waiting for him to take his shirt off. Man. What a glorious physique. It wasn't extremely defined, but it was definitely very fit. His hockey practice was pretty close by to where I lived, so I gave him a ride home.

This went on for a while, and then I asked him one day if he would like to go to the gym at my apartment complex with me, because he's a gym rat and I wanted to get in shape. (Btw, this was how it triggered my whole gym thing from last year) He said sure, and unnfff it was awesome having a workout buddy to spot me and like teach me new exercises and shit, while I could just stare at his muscles and his incredibly short shorts where his bulge would some times be impossibly obvious I swear either he was deliberately shoving his dick in my face or straight guys are really just THAT oblivious. I'm a huge pervie I know, I know. We would then hit the sauna after, and I would always playfully squeeze his chest or his biceps, and some times graze around his nipples a lil longer than hetero fwahaha. Seriously though, how dafuq do I get away with all these brazen shit that I do?? He would always just kind of laugh and let me play with him, but not once did he ever try to reciprocate or show any expression that he was enjoying the attention. I still haven't come to a conclusion really, but I'm guessing he's straight...We have also kinda lost contact. I'll be going back up to Hong Kong some time though and will definitely hit him up. This time, I'll also just casually mention to him that I'll be going to a gay bar there and see if he wants to join.

And you know what. I've really realized that it's awesome to be a "gay-bro." It's really like best of both worlds. I can casually mention going to a gay club/bar and people would get the hint and I can use this to my advantage to seek out all the gay guys in the crowd, and because I'm dudely enough for people not to really question too much, there really isn't a lot of gossiping at all! I guess it isn't really very exciting to gossip about a regular guy, but like yeah, I asked the loosest cannon of my friends that I've came out to, and she said she hasn't told anyone about it, even when others who I've told tried to talk to her about it, she wasn't sure if they really heard it from me so she would divert and say other dumb things like "I know he's not in school now, he's in Asia!" AHHHHH dude. Seriously. Great palz all y'all, great palz.

Okay. Woah that was a long segue. I'll break it up into another entry. Catch y'all later, time to hit the gym and try out the new protein shake!

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