Waddup home fries??? I have 4000 views now! Wootwoot!
Couldn't find a manlier version of this lyric video but whatevs. Chorus is fucking SPEAKING to me right now, I say SPEAKING yo
I've figured out that joy is not in your arms
I know I'll always ache with an empty heart
I think it's time to run cause I'm seeing stars
I'm seeing stars watch me fall apart
Gonna keep my entries more succinct from now on cos my entries are fucking long. Here goes!
I'm feeling a lot better now. Friday I went to a gay club with two of my gay friends, R and his friend J, but I didn't have fun at all. I left, drove back, and stopped halfway to call S. I asked S if he would stop talking to me if his boyfriend asked him to, and he said maybe. I asked other questions, and finally asked him if he wanted to shut the door on me, yes or no, and he said yes. I was fucking mad with this fuckwad. I came back home, and talked to him till 5 am. He told me he's getting back with his guy, even though he can't bring himself to kiss him, and still feels like he doesn't really feel anything that strongly for him. What the flying fuck?? You know the phrase "we accept the love we think we deserve" ??? This dude right here is a shining fucking example of that!
It's really sad because I am so sure we could have been so SO good for each other. Too bad for him because seriously this is totally his loss. I would really have given an arm and leg for this kid (well okay maybe not). I'm also beginning to feel he is not good enough for me anyway, and I will find someone better. Meanwhile though, I still thoroughly miss him, but not in a way that it makes me cry though, so I guess that's okay.
Today is Monday and he finally messaged me back, after a string of long messages I wrote to him on Saturday saying shit like "I'm not gonna give up on us just yet." Fucker took so long to reply me. Not gonna reply him back for a while. Am also gonna upload all the pictures I took of him/us on Facebook and let him feel the wincing pain of missing out on all these awesome memories that he could have continued creating with me.
Okay sorry, I've really become a megabitch from this hahaha.
Saturday I went to the fashion show that one of my Jackd hookups...hooked me up with! Hahaha!! It was pretty cool shit, other than the fact that 90% of the guys there were basically girls (many carried actual female handbags, some wore high heels), one of the male models however is OMG, one of my fav A&F models hahaha, uhhhmmm I'll just link his pictures:
WARNING: COMPLETELY NSFW DUE TO MULTIPLE PEENS
He ran past me in his tanktop with a half-smirk and his chest bouncing errwhere and I went soft like a lil girl...hahahaha.
At night I went to the after-party, along with my army bros, and seriously I LOVE THESE BROS SO MUCHHH. One dude recently broke up with his girl, and the others also knew about my heartbreak with S, so the other two guys bought a bottle of Moet each...man, big spending. We had a blast, them checking out the chicks, me checking out the dicks (only the male models cuz as I said 90% of the guys were basic bitches), then dancing to the SICK SICK SICK beats by the DJs, then all hopped in my car, went to another club, I bought the drinks this time, then they all went over to my pad, drank more, passed out, woke up to find the guys singing karaoke by themselves...hahaha. These guys are seriously so awesome. They even asked me if I've taken it up the ass before and if I wanted to try...hahahah. The dude who broke up also confessed to me (under the influence of alcohol) that he once had a major crush on this really dudely IT consultant back when he was in high school! Hot damn!!! Hahaha. He assures me he doesn't like penis though, oh well :o(
Sunday I drove em all out to have some sickass shoyu ramen, AHHHH I LOVE RAMEN SO MUCHHH. Dude. Tamago (the egg) is. the. shit. Not lying when I say I can eat 5 of them at one go. Then I came back, tanned by my pool, and now am kickass bronzed yo. Today I had a good gym day, did squats too, and shitttttt it aches when I stand up haha.
So I actually had 8 invites for the fashion after-party, so there were a few other boring friends of R that came along. Some chick and some dude. Yo okay, so I really don't like average people, like, I don't see the point of being mundane and boring really. And that's what I find about nice people, more often than not, nice people are just plain boring. So take the blog that FoC recommended me, it's great and all, but it's so saccharine sweet, and written so obviously like a YouTuber going "subscribe to mah videos!!!1111" and with a style that is so incredibly smiley-face happy-nice that I just find it really fake!!! I really don't see any personality behind being nice, it's really one-dimensional....at least to me. Of course I'm not saying people have to be an evil shithead to be interesting, but being inherently a nice dude and being a smiley face Stepford wife is totally different.
SOME PICTURES OF THE WEEKEND:
|Dream car, this or maybe the new jag f-type|
|CALLING ALL THE BASIC BITCHES!|
Also, shit I did today cos I was bored!
Ectomorph + being Asian = man my arms are tiny! Alright gotta hit the sack now, also entry still ended up being kinda long dammit
Also, this shit cracked me up: