Saturday, August 10, 2013

But I'm a 90's bitch


Dude.

Hmm. My life is hardly sustainable but whatever I'll worry when I'm older

Did some hammock tanning at home by the pool, super chill, I've got a great tan now and I'm loving it. Went to the gym to work out after, and took ninja shots of this dude with an incredible ass. Omg. Firstly, I am rarely attracted to Asians in my country but this dude was hot, plus he kept staring at me...and I am rarely attracted to butts but what a beaut!

 

Damn son!!! I just love looking at dudes working out it's so hot hahaha I'm such a perv. 

And Jack'd is honestly like a game for me now, collecting unread messages like Pokemon really. Changed my pictures to just racy headless shots and dudes just lapped it up like crazy...how pathetic! Oh well. I crossed 400! Yeah okay whatever hah. Also kinda pissed dudes reported my picture so now I'm picture-less for the next five days. Well, doesn't matter I guess, Jack'd has gotten kind of pointless now that I have my prince of Persia hah. 


After my gym sesh I drove out to meet my Indonesian friend for dinner since he's in town for a coupla days. Talked to him about my coming out and being supes comfortable with myself and shit. Honestly still think he's gay, actually like all my friends have kinda already assumed he's gay and waiting for him to come out of the closet but I guess he still needs time. So I just wanted to be like the out gay dude for him in case he ever needs to talk. We also talked about how it's so hard for people like us to find people from similar backgrounds of well yeah, being an international Asian. I'm so used to hanging out with people from all over the world, I'm mighty determined to continue doing that. 

He tagged along with me to a gay bar to meet Half-German Guy (HGG) with me. HGG is actually really adorable. And he isn't stereotypically feminine, plus he went to international school, dresses well, and loves to party. Dude. My kind of crowd. I just like surrounding myself with attractive international people. We talked a bit about his army stuff, I talked about my experience, blahblah, then we headed off to a club to meet his friends.

Man. Honestly if I have to talk about my talents, one of them is that I am somehow really good at meeting rich people. The entire crew there were all Eurasians, just like HGG, all went to international schools here, and there was this chick that spends buttloads of money because her dad works with an oil company or something, and pays in cash some times because her cards are "frozen." My Indo friend was telling me that she sounds very Chindo (Chinese-Indonesian), because of paying by cash, frozen assets, lol...


So she bought the Belvedere Belver Bear Jeroboam and along with a couple of Doms. All by herself. That's like at the very least 3 grand. It's just nuts. And these kids are 19-20. They haven't even started college! I can never be friends with these people in real life because they have no grasp on reality at all, but it's ohsoawesome to party with these irresponsible brats since it's just free booze. After the bear came with sparklers and shit, loads more of her "friends" turned up at the table to mooch off her. This is why I don't wave my money (that much) in front of people's faces, because I don't want to only have friends just because they want my money. I'm quite thankful most of my friends are either genuine good people that just love to tease me about being a prince, or well, they're already from rich families anyway.

Also this is kinda off-topic but I remember after coming back from Uganda I became very determined to try and do something for the less fortunate in the future. Possibly even work for a cool responsible NGO. Or once I have a good amount of money I'll build like an orphanage or something. Something small definitely, not gonna be very big, and also not very interested in helping people around me (you know how people always say oh but these people going off to Africa for "voluntourism" should start in their own backyard) because what's the fun in that, I need some kind of cultural exchange thing going on too. I've kinda lost that humanitarian thing in me now though, and I'm not going to do it unless I genuinely want to help people, so hopefully somewhere in the future I'll get back to that again.

Anyhoo, it was a great night. Free booze, who wouldn't want it? Plus the chick was real nice to me (HGG told his friends that we met on Jack'd and stuff so that's cool) and well, the rest of her friends were pretty cool too. Also it was awesome that my Filipino friend (although my friends are from Indonesia and the Philippines, they're ethnically Chinese) and my Spanish friend were in the club too with their friends so we got to hang out for a bit. After a while though, we all got pretty drunk, and I don't exactly remember how, but HGG and I started making out. I think he got a little freaked because I made out with him outside an elevator in public, and he was like dude we're in public and I realized I forgot that I'm not in London anymore where N and I basically made out everywhere. One thing led to another and we found ourselves in the parking lot behind like the pipes or something naked and sucking off each other. Man. It was pretty hot. However, I think I was the first dude he hooked up with...since he told me he only has two gay friends and he's young (19), because he was honestly not very good at kissing. Maybe he was drunk. But I have shitloads of cuts on my lips now because he bit me multiple times...ouch. He also kinda freaked after a while and so we quickly got our clothes back on when he heard someone, but I couldn't find my fucking underwear in my drunken stupor so I went home underwearless...what a slut. Lol. He texted me later saying he isn't used to this horny erotic shit and apologized for being weird. Hahaha. It's really kind of amazing how I've become so comfortable with guys now.

Anyway, so I've talked to N, and I've told him that for now I simply see myself on an extended bachelor party until we reunite in October (or earlier if I go up to London) and I tie myself down to him. And he's okay with it, as long as I don't do buttsekz with others. Which is completely fine by me, since I don't even enjoy it at all. So I'm glad we got it all figured out, because he knows at the end of the day I'm choosing to be with him, although he said he is very jealous that he isn't with me, and he's a little afraid that I'll replace him. I told him to chill, because just like the dudes I met on my grad trip, I just want to have some playful fun that's all, but I don't see myself being with them. So yeah. Woot!

Also think HGG's gonna be a good pal of mine, the other two gay friends of his are extremely sassy and Birkin bag-wearing kind of people. I'm pretty lucky to always meet more masculine kind of guys, although I guess that's also because I've distanced myself from my feminine gay friends...

And ok, I think I'm becoming more confident of myself now. But it might be tipping over to cockiness. To think I was so different 7 months ago! Now I know that I am very much capable of having attractive guys interested in me, I'm no longer that self-conscious about my appearance and stuff. Going to the gym has definitely helped this self-confidence since I kinda like how my body is slowly but surely transforming. I never wore tanks in the past since I didn't like how small my arms looked, but it's all good now haha. And ok this is a lil TMI (too much information) but whatever this is my blog I can say what I want to, but in the past I used to also be deathly self-conscious about my weiner since I had a really tight foreskin and I couldn't pull it back at all (phimosis) and it bothered me because it was weird and also because whenever I jizzed it would only dribble since I guess the foreskin was in the way. Not being sexually active made me avoid sex even more, since I wasn't out anyway. But after coming out, I started reading up about how to like, loosen it and shit, and I spent like a couple minutes everyday in the shower tugging at the lil thing like a fool. I remember back with Aussie it was still pretty tight and the next day it hurt so much from the friction and abrasion I had to use some kind of burn cream on it :/ Now everything's totally cool bro! And I'm able to shoot prettay far like all over my chest and shit so yeah hahaha. So yeah, I'm a lot more chill about being naked in front of other people now. Hell yeah baby. And I've definitely become quite an exhibitionist too.

I have blocked SAP on Whatsapp and deleted him off Facebook because he is honestly fucking insane and super unchill about just being friends and about me not giving him a chance. I really don't get him.

Right. So for now, I gotta figure out what HR's plans are for me on Monday (please please waive my 4 weeks' notice), and start thinking about a new job. The world is my oyster. Mmm yum oysters. Damn dude my record is 15 at one go. Yeah baby. But yeah, gotta figure out what I wanna do man. And also can't wait to do coupley things with N, like go to Universal Studios with him, eat at swanky places together, make dudes at gay clubs jealous together lol, work out together, steam room together, cuddle and spoon together, take loads of photos together, and stuff! Man! I am getting bad at this blogging thing.

11 comments:

  1. If I were N, I would get a chastity belt for you. Kidding.

    And erm, you're from the 80s but I'm a 90s bitch :P. Okay, you're a 90s bitch at heart, I'll give you that.

    -jw

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    1. Hehehe asshole!

      I definitely look young enough to hang with the crowd I was with anyway, and well I'll be the one laughing when I'm 50 and still looking 30!

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    2. You do know that all that tanning will accelerate the ageing of your skin right?

      -jw

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    3. You have to meet me in person to see that my skin is the best part of my body - it doesn't age!

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    4. Haha, guess I'll have to see it for myself. Let's meet before you leave S'pore for good?

      -jw

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    5. sure. drop me an email anytime you're free dude

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  2. Do you prefer to break in newbie gays or deal with more experienced guys? Are you mentor or mentee when it comes all things gay? Seems like you could teach HGG some things since he's so young.

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    1. Both are cool with me. I think it's fun with newbie guys because it reminded me of myself back then. I think it has become a bit of a trust issue that's all, where I feel that I can trust that a younger guy would be more genuine and less sketchy than an older-than-me guy. But then again younger doesn't mean less experienced.

      And yes, I'll love to teach HGG a couple of things but he's gone for 3 weeks in Taiwan for his military training, plus I don't exactly think we're going to hookup again, unless we get drunk of course. I'll definitely teach him how to kiss without using teeth, wtf, lips are still swollen...

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    2. Kenndo's not picky as long as the guy is hot.

      -jw

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    3. Kenn-do is kind of picky, just that the standards are relaxed when he is drunk. Alcohol does loosen the inhibitions. It's the great equalizer for guys who don't measure up to his exacting standards when sober. There's hope for the rest of us. :-)

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